The funny things that people say

Two weeks ago, my niece (my brother's daughter who knows me as both her uncle and aunt), my mother-in-law and I (in boy mode) were talking. I don't remember why, but my niece suddenly decided to make a mischievous remark along the lines of

I think that you are far better at applying eye-liner than I am.

I wasn't sure how my mother-in-law would react, and while I was trying to work out what to say next, my mother-in-law responded with

Some of the best makeup artists are men.

To which I responded

That depends on how much makeup they're wearing at the time.

The conversation just stopped right there. I can't imagine how my mother-in-law could fit that in with what she knows about me if she really doesn't know that I'm a cross-dresser.

The following weekend, my wife and son went away with my in-laws for the Australia Day long weekend. They took an extra day at each end of the weekend for travelling, so they left on Friday and returned on Tuesday.

That made the timing of their return interesting, as Tuesday night is the night that I go out for dinner with the girls. In some ways, I hoped that they would arrive just before I left as Alice while in other ways I still wanted to avoid having my in-laws see me that way.

Well, the timing worked out okay for avoidance. I left before they arrived, having put away all my makeup gear from the bathroom and tidied almost everything in our bedroom. Not that my in-laws tend to look in our bedroom. They've seen but never commented about the row of 9 wigs on stands along one wall, and now they seem to avoid even going to our bedroom doorway. :)

After I got home, my wife told me about a little conversation that went on in the car on the way home about picking up takeaway dinner on the way. When asked if they would need to get enough food for me as well, my wife said

No, he usually goes out for dinner on Tuesday nights

onto which my son added

as Alice.

LOL. No response. Nothing.

I'm left trying to decide whether to send friend invites to a few of my wife's relatives on facebook. :)

Total lack of recognition

While helping my father-in-law to create and set up his facebook profile last night, my profile photo came up on the screen in the people you might know section. My mother-in-law was looking over his shoulder and there wasn't the slightest hint of recognition from either of them. I wonder if they'll ever look more closely at the photo. :)

Then again, from experience, I know that I can walk into a store or restaurant in boy mode and girl mode at different times, and even if the staff know that I'm both, they won't recognise me as the same person between the two. For that matter, if I change between being a redhead and brunette girl, a lot of people don't recognise me or have to stop and think about it.

One waitress who knew me as a girl (and lets face it, going out for dinner with a group of crossdressers means that she knew I wasn't a real girl) only realised that I was the same person in boy mode because I addressed her by name as soon as I walked in the door, and ordered the exact same meal. :)

Perhaps one of the most flattering comments that I've ever had was from a woman in a Tree of Life store. I'd been there in boy mode and chatted with her when I bought myself some jewellery. A couple of weeks later, I went in in girl mode and she had her hair done differently. I commented that I almost didn't recognise her because her hair was different. We chatted briefly, but she didn't say anything to indicate that she recognised me. It was a few weeks until I saw her again, and I was again in boy mode. When I walked in, her eyes lit up and she had a huge smile on her face. She said something like

That was you, wasn't it?

I smiled, and she said

You had me completely fooled until you spoke.

and admitted that she hadn't realised who I was until after I walked out of the store.

I guess I need to work on my voice more... :)

Neighbours, friends and family

I promised in my last post that I'd describe my neighbour's reaction when I invited her as a friend on Yahoo 360 last year...

I sent her an invite in late August but she didn't respond until mid September. Because I hardly ever use 360 any more, I probably didn't get the messages for another week or two after that.

It turns out that she was shocked when she realised who I was. She didn't see it coming. She really didn't know, which is sort of funny because I had completely convinced myself that she must have known by then. She only worked it out by reading my blog posts. I don't think that she even recognised me from my photos.

She said no to my friend request, but sent me a message to explain why, and I'm cool with that. We still chat over the fence quite often and as long as I avoid the subject of my crossdressing, we're fine.

That's a lot like my mother. She's known for many years but doesn't want to talk about it.

I guess if my neighbour ever invites me as a friend on facebook, I'll know that she's really accepted me but I'm still content with the knows but doesn't want to know position.

A few months ago, I came out to an older couple who I've been friends with for many years. I had no idea what the reaction was going to be, and was pleasantly surprised when they were quite positive about it. The lady even laughed and said that her uncle had been in Les Girls but got too old and had to retire due to arthritis.

I visited them again on Boxing Day, and chatted about all sorts of things, including my crossdressing. I'm truly amazed and happy that they are so accepting.

I still don't whether my inlaws don't know I'm a crossdresser, or they have figured it out but make an effort to pretend not to know. I had pretty much convinced myself that they do know but are pretending not to, but after re-reading my neighbour's comments from when I invited her as a friend on yahoo, I'm not so sure now. I'm really going to have to drop it into conversation one of these days. :p