31 January 2009

The funny things that people say

Two weeks ago, my niece (my brother's daughter who knows me as both her uncle and aunt), my mother-in-law and I (in boy mode) were talking. I don't remember why, but my niece suddenly decided to make a mischievous remark along the lines of
I think that you are far better at applying eye-liner than I am.
I wasn't sure how my mother-in-law would react, and while I was trying to work out what to say next, my mother-in-law responded with
Some of the best makeup artists are men.
To which I responded
That depends on how much makeup they're wearing at the time.
The conversation just stopped right there. I can't imagine how my mother-in-law could fit that in with what she knows about me if she really doesn't know that I'm a cross-dresser.

The following weekend, my wife and son went away with my in-laws for the Australia Day long weekend. They took an extra day at each end of the weekend for travelling, so they left on Friday and returned on Tuesday.

That made the timing of their return interesting, as Tuesday night is the night that I go out for dinner with the girls. In some ways, I hoped that they would arrive just before I left as Alice while in other ways I still wanted to avoid having my in-laws see me that way.

Well, the timing worked out okay for avoidance. I left before they arrived, having put away all my makeup gear from the bathroom and tidied almost everything in our bedroom. Not that my in-laws tend to look in our bedroom. They've seen but never commented about the row of 9 wigs on stands along one wall, and now they seem to avoid even going to our bedroom doorway. :)

After I got home, my wife told me about a little conversation that went on in the car on the way home about picking up takeaway dinner on the way. When asked if they would need to get enough food for me as well, my wife said
No, he usually goes out for dinner on Tuesday nights
onto which my son added
as Alice.
LOL. No response. Nothing.

I'm left trying to decide whether to send friend invites to a few of my wife's relatives on facebook. :)


  1. By the sounds of it, your in laws know about "Alice". I guess they were just brought up in a generation/era when cross-dressing and other things (even sex was not spoken about, these days however children know and discuss a lot more then when our parents were young)was "hidden" away, and things like this were not discussed "openly". These days however cross-dressing and the like, people are more "open" to things like this, and "accept" them as the "norm".

  2. LOL, it sounds like they either have no idea, or don't want to know. I reckon you should send a few invites and see what happens.

  3. We've been trying for years to work out whether it's "don't know" or "know but won't say anything". After these last couple of incidents, I just can't imagine it being "don't know". :)

    I'm still thinking about the timing of sending invites, and who to. I don't know whether to start with my father-in-law, my sister-in-law or one of my wife's cousins... Maybe several or all of them. :)

  4. I say send them to all of them and then wait to see what happens. But I suppose it depends on how much you want to rock the boat, no point sending out invites if you think they are going to react negatively. Like Gem says, I think people are more open to that type of thing now.

    So saying, I'm sure my folks have no idea about that type of thing, which is why I wonder if your in laws know or not. My folks could see all of the things your in laws have and would have no idea what they meant.

  5. I think they know but don't want to face the reality. It's the prudish way that generation trying to "cope" with things: if you don't talk about it = it doesn't exist. Typical "English" way. Trust me, my in laws are British. LOL.

  6. Well that makes it quite difficult then cause if they don't want to know, do you be blatant about it and tell them or not? What are you going to do Alice?

  7. I don't honestly know. I'll keep dropping unsubtle hints, and probably send friend invites to relatives who I think are least likely to react badly.

    I think that sooner or later, I have to clear the air and tell them outright. I'm very good at procrastinating, though...

  8. Is it important to you that they know? If it is, why don't you just have a family dinner and tell everyone? Or you could just write them a letter and then contact them a few weeks later. My Uncle did that when he came out (he's gay), and it worked really well, cause it gave people time to adjust to it before they saw him again.