13 September 2007

Steamroller day

(imported from yahoo 360)

I'm sure everyone has them. Days where you feel like you've been run over by a steamroller.

I'm sitting here at about midnight thinking "what on earth did I do today?"
  • Phone interview for SX News as the unofficial Australian spokesperson for the wikipedia LGBT project? No, that was yesterday. Being hetero and being interviewed by a gay magazine as the representative of a primarily gay group is a bit odd, mind you...
  • Work? Well, maybe but it hardly seems like it. I know that I spent several hours working but for the life of me I can't really work out what I achieved doing it.
  • Thursday night shopping? Yep, that'll do it. Try looking at the shoes that your partner is trying on while trying to keep a hyperactive 4yo from knocking over the neatly stacked shoe boxes in the shop. Lots of fun. Not.
Something doesn't add up. I can only account for about half the hours since I got up this morning. I seem to have lost half a day somewhere and I can't work out where or how.

My son was actually fairly well behaved today aside from the shoe shop incident. And yet, here I sit, absolutely exhausted and wondering why.

Maybe, just maybe, it's because I haven't had any "me" time for way too long. As strange as it will sound to some people, having some time without interruptions to do my makeup, dress in a nice outfit and go out shopping or to visit a friend for a while is one of the most enjoyable and relaxing things that I can do.

To many women, this would sound perfectly normal. I guess to most guys, this probably sounds like a normal "girl" thing to do. Well, when I'm in that "mode", that's exactly who I am. An ugly girl perhaps, but a girl nonetheless.

So, at the end of a steamroller day, I sit back and imagine a time in the future when I'll be able to dress up nicely and go out as that girl, without trying to avoid being seen by the neighbours or the fear of being abused simply for being a girl. Somehow, knowing that I'm going to do that sometime soon makes getting over being flattened by a steamroller day just that little bit easier to cope with.

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